Should You Replace “What If” with “As If”?

October 8, 2018

Imagine living each day as if:

  • you had all you need.
  • you did what is for your highest and greatest good.
  • you are creating.
  • you are earning money.
  • you’re in healthy relationships.
  • you’re doing fulfilling work.
  • you love yourself completely and unconditionally.

The list can keep going! Can you see the endless possibilities?

Most of us live in a self-talk world of what if. Do you identify with this?

  • What if I win the Lotto?
  • What if my relationships were more fulfilling?
  • What if I loved my job?
  • What if I loved myself?

Again, the list can keep going, but it shouldn’t.

Words and thoughts create and have energy. The energy in the words we speak have a vibration. As if is a statement. It is here and now, it is present. We are having an influence on the thought, feelings, beliefs. It is empowering and exciting to live as if it is happening now. I want to live as if it is happening now. Do you?

If we live in what if, where are we? The thoughts might be:

“What if I loved my life? It’s impossible. I can’t even imagine what that would be like”.

How is the vibration of this energy? What if asks a question, what if is passive, what if is a giving away of your power. Do you want to live with a question mark hanging over your head? I do not.

Change the thought, change the energy. What if is the energy of worry. As if is the energy of now!

I prefer to live in the energy of as if, as if the satisfaction of my desire(s) is already happening in my life. That may feel scary because moving from what if energy to as if energy means letting go of old patterns, beliefs, limiting thoughts and ideas. Our deeper mind believes we need these limiting thoughts. What if thoughts have no destination and are filled with uncertainty, longing, lower confidence, passiveness, being a victim, hopelessness, helplessness and powerlessness.

So do we wait in what-if mode, not moving forward or looking back in regret? Or do we live each day to the fullest? Even the days that are “the worst days ever“? Is there even a glimmer of something positive in that day? It may be your pet, your breath, the roof over your head, the food in your fridge. As if even in all of this sadness, upset, crisis you are still okay. I encourage you to let go of the negative things that happened yesterday and expect good things from today.

Years ago, as I was in the midst of struggling from my own childhood pain, I saw a picture in my therapist’s office waiting room. The picture had always been on the wall I just was not ready to see it yet. This day I was ready. The picture was of a rose opening from a bud and alongside the rose was a quote:

“And the day came when the risk it took to remain tight in a bud was more painful than the risk it took to blossom.”  (Anis Nin)

It hit me like a ton of bricks. It was my aha moment. I knew then and there that by holding onto my story, by letting my story define me, my identification as a victim was causing me more pain than being brave and feeling my deepest fears. I was ready to move away from the what if. What if I could speak my truth? What if I could honor myself? What if I told my story? That what if was so scary for me that I stayed stuck. The what if was limiting me.

Collage of a woman inside a blossoming flower.

“Winter” by Rachel Derum

This quote was the beginning for me. It helped me begin to move to as if. As if I speak my truth, as if I live each day honoring myself, as if I am telling my story. And you know what? It started to shift. It still took a lot of time, and believe me I am still a work in progress; I spent a lot of years in therapy. I had to learn to have a lot of patience and kindness towards myself. But here I am now living my life, still with bumps, frustrations, pain and as if I always wanted it to be just as it is right now.


One comment:

  1. Harriette

    October 12, 2018 at 7:11 pm

    Great article that certainly stimulates thinking about the possibility to live as if. As if it’s going to be ok. As if I do something good for myself. As if this day is what it is supposed to be. Thanks for your contribution



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